Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Day 11 - Ten Things That Make me MAD

I don't necessarily think it's a good idea for people to talk about all the things that make them mad. It makes them feel aggressive and negative. In fact, it really makes me mad when people keep dwelling on all the things that make them mad!!

...So here we go!

1. Cruelty to animals. Any animal. Any form of cruelty--I'll be the judge. In fact, even moderate impoliteness to our animal friends twists my knickers. If you are around while I'm watching "Animal Cops Houston" you'll want to stay out of my way. I am fearsome to behold if I hear about a brutalized raccoon or a starved pony. WATCH OUT!

2:
What the h-e-l-l!? Gross! Child beauty pageants are what is wrong with America. Clear those out and it's pretty much smooth sailing for our country, I say.

3. Michael Bay movies (see: Armageddon, Transformers 1 AND 2, Pearl Harbor, Bad Boys, and the music video for Meat Loaf's "Picture Show" from the Bat Out of Hell album.)
As a rule, everyone is sweaty, fluorescent-colored, constantly spewing shallow innuendos, and surrounded by superfluous showers of sparks for no apparent reason. Seriously, the appearance of flying sparks in Michael Bay movies could be the basis for some kind of drinking game. It's like he's got to have some kind of industrial welding going on in every single shot! Plus there's that part in Transformers where the giant transformer "lubricates" (robot-pees) on John Turturro. Spark showers and sweaty people aside, that scene in and of itself was enough for me to blacklist all things Bay.

4. Working in customer service. Why? Because the customer is NOT always right. I should be able to tell them so. I hate living the lie that is "customer service."

5. Insincerity

6. Not knowing what people are REALLY thinking. See: Insincerity.

7. Getting pushed off a building by someone would probably make me really mad.

8. LOST Season 6. I wish I could push it off a building. Then at least something would happen!

9. When the dog pees on my newly laundered clothes. Also, antisemitism.

10. The Arab-Israeli conflict. No one's a winner there.

4 comments:

Lizzie Jones said...

This list is pure awesomeness. From child pageants to Arab-Israeli conflict. Ohhh, you make me laugh so hard. Quote of the day.

What Makes Annie Mad: "When the dog pees on my newly laundered clothes. Also, antisemitism."

Jesse C said...

These are funny. Thanks for the laugh.

Lynn said...

All of those are pretty good reasons to be mad.

Tiffany said...

Number 9 is my favorite