Awkward Encounters - Part 2

I was still thinking about what I should have said to Safeway Guy when, later that day, I took the dogs to the dog park. We were on our way to the secluded corner of the park and I passed an older looking woman. I thought I'd be polite and smile at her--but my smile was ignored. She continued past me looking somewhat preoccupied, or distracted.

About five minutes went by and Lando, Chase, and I were in a far corner of the park playing fetch. I had the ball and, raising my arm to throw it, I happened to glance behind me. What caught my attention first was that there was the distracted lady about 20 yards away behind a tree. Wait--what is she doing? Why is she crouching behind that tree? Whoa--her pants are down around her ankles! I had to turn away quickly. My brain was being bombarded--it's got to work extra hard to process such a wholly...unexpected...sight. I glanced around at the other park patrons, who could have easily shared my shock had they just turned around, but they were all oblivious. So I hazard another glance at the lady, thinking I hadn't seen what I thought I'd seen, but--no--upon looking again, there she was, still crouching behind the tree, her dog sitting calmly by. And for the first time in my life, I actually thought the phrase, "Boy, I hope she is just peeing."

A few seconds later, I made the mistake of turning around a third time. She had stood up by now, but my eyes went first to the small, bulging doggy poop bag in her hand and then, as if in slow motion, up to her face where, for a quarter of a second, our eyes met. And in that quarter of a second, I knew that she knew that I knew; the only witness to her--I don't even know what to call it--malfeasance? Indiscretion? Public pooping escapade? Of course, I instantly diverted my eyes and pretended to watch the parking lot for awhile while she cleared out, trying to keep my incredulous laughter quiet. I try to keep my judgments to a minimum, but I guess she just really had to go...or something.

Needless to say, she vigilantly avoided me for the rest of our time in the park.

And I avoided the other side of that tree.