The Final Takeover...

Remember that movie, Planet of the Apes? An astronaut leaves earth and crash lands on a planet where civilized monkeys are the rulers and men the beasts. Only, we come to find out, this is not some far off planet, but our own earth--taken over by apes who enslaved mankind and took over! The whole scenario is quite preposterous, or so I used to think. Ever since we got a dog, however, I've been thinking the science fiction classic is perhaps not as fictional as we all think...

This is how it starts:

You buy a puppy. A cute, snuggly little guy who you teach to sit and roll over. He patronizes you with his tricks, but don't be fooled. He's simply biding his time.

You love your puppy so much, you can't help getting another pet. You're thinking: Great! More cute, snuggly pets to keep you company and enrich your life. Your dog is thinking: Great! New recruits. While you're busy buying squeaky ducks and Beggin' Strips, your dog is amassing an army...

At first they charm you with the novelty of animals acting like people. When they jump on your furniture, you find it so endearing that you run to get your camera, but soon... 

...they realize they don't need you in order to enjoy your bed:

...or your chair:

Here the strongest member is poised to ward me off lest I attempt to reclaim my chair. The fact is, you are outnumbered and they all know it...

So there is not much to be done when you wake up to find you are sharing your pillow with a Corgi.  All you really can do is put your arm around him and go back to sleep. He owns you now:

From here it's just a matter of learning how to speak English and sew rudimentary frocks for themselves before we humans become obsolete. Next thing you know, Charlton Heston shows up damning them all the hell in his most desperate holler. And you think, maybe things have gotten a little out of hand.

So let this be a warning for all mankind: Never let your dog (or an ape) sleep in your bed. It may seem innocent enough, but this is just how it starts...