Tuesday, March 31, 2009

A Rigid Search

We are leaving the state. The reason is because Roo will be doing an internship this summer with a company in San Francisco...but also because things just haven't been the same since the Delta Center became the Engergy Solutions Arena...

So, last weekend we went searching for someplace to live and this is what we found:

Option 1: A studio apartment in an ultra-modern renovated warehouse in East Bay. Pros: There's nothing cooler than living in an old warehouse. It even had a cool rooftop deck and was fully furnished.

Cons: The apartment was roughly the size of a solitary confinement cell. Also, I suspect it was haunted by the child laborers who used to work there.

Rent: $1500 per month



Option 2: A cute one-bedroom Victorian flat on Nob Hill similar to the one below.

Pros: Very picturesque, in the middle of the city, great views, had one of those elevators with the gate you have to lift up like in the movies.

Cons: Very old, few spots for the dogs to do their business, parking is non-existent except for an occasional spot on a 1000% grade hill across the street. Also see: Rent

Rent: An arm and a leg, plus one more extremity for a parking spot in a parking garage.

Option 3: A new, industrial-chic complex on the border of Oakland and Emeryville.

Pros: Finely furnished, washer drier in unit, the complex is fortified like a prison for safety. As we were waiting here on this corner to be shown the unit, we found it provided for the perfect "San Francisco" experience: across the street dread-locked hippies with Pink Floyd t-shirts kept streaming out of this house, pouring their drinks in the bushes, piling stuff into their van. The complex was on the border of the ghetto, and homeless cart-pushers would occasionally walk down the street mumbing to themselves while a gay couple stood looking at the complex trying to decide if they wanted to live here.

Cons: Roo noticed this ambigous sign at the elementary school across the street, "WARNING-Drug Free School Zone". It could be interpreted many ways, but I interpreted it as "I don't want to live here".

Rent: Your firstborn child. Plus utilities.

Option 4: One bedroom apartment in Sausalito overlooking the bay.

Pros: Amazing view, pet friendly, great area. Also see: Rent

Cons: 25 minute drive from work, 30 year old buildings.

Rent: $1440/mo plus utilities. In the real world, that is outrageously high for 700 square feet of 30-year old space. In San Francisco, it's a steal.

Option 5: Our rental car. We asked for a compact and ended up in this. Lumbering over those massive hills and one-way streets, trying to parallel park it felt enormous enough to live in.

Cons: Living as fugitives from Budget Rental Co.

Option 6: We happened upon Lucas Valley Road. We knew George Lucas lives somewhere on this road, so we drove along hoping maybe he'd invite us in to play with the ewoks in his backyard, have lunch with Harrison Ford, and stay on for the summer at the ranch.

Cons: George Lucas's house is protected by some kind of force shield to keep people out. We couldn't find it.

Option 7: We went on a drive up Lucas Valley Road and found this perfectly situated little church. I thought it was so lovely.


Cons: I'd probably have to become some kind of pastor or something to live in it.
Rent: My eternal soul. Plus utilities.

Option 8:

Pros: see picture

Cons: Only three things on the menu. Even the "secret" menu is fairly confined.

Rent: Clogged arteries and a massive heart attack at age 30. Plus utilities.

So many options. We've got some big decisions to make!





10 comments:

Deja said...

I laughed, smiled. And then I laughed harder when you said "plus utilities" the last time. Heart attack, plus utilities. HA!

I vote for the one overlooking the bay.

Also, yippee! That's what I have to say about you heading to SF for the summer. That'll be super cool.

Sarah said...

I'm so excited for you! Hey and we'll call George Lucas for you, I'm sure he has a place for you to stay during the summer! Let us know when your here, we'll drive up to see you!

Troy and Nancee Tegeder said...

Looks like option 4 is your best bet. That was seriously the most hilarious post. Of about 50 posts I've read over the last week, this is the only one I showed Troy.

Lynn said...

I didn't realize you had so many varied options. I do wonder how Lando and Chase would fare in option #5?

Emily said...

Have you looked in San Leandro or Livermore? I don't know much about the suburbs of San Fran but I know real people live there and you can get to the city on BART. Doh!

Jesse C said...

I vote In 'n' Out.

Mike and Emily said...

oooo...tough one. Do they have altar-women at that little church? Any good bushes in the graveyard?

Brittney said...

You are so funny! And it took me forever to find your blog I kept typing it in wrong! Anyway gotta love your pros and cons! I say go for the car! And so sad you weren't able to see George Lucas I bet Roo was disappointed! Nob Hill is really nice my dad used to work at a hotel there- note to you if you do live there make sure your brakes work this comes from personal experience!

E.Maxine.Wright said...

Ha ha HA! I vote for Option #3. Think of the MISSIONARY OPPORTUNITY!!!! All you'll need is a Book of Mormon and pepper spray! (Honestly, I vote you guys move in with us. We have extra shelving in the storage room--you can each have your own bunk. Not to mention, when you get the midnight munchies you can open a can of Spam.)

Grace said...

San Francisco will be so fun for the summer!